Police: Drunk guy spreads local love, climbs into bed with neighbors

There’s nothing wrong with trying to get along with your neighbors, but having a threesome with them might be asking too much. A Michigan couple was snuggled up in bed early Sunday morning when a 27-year-old man who lives a few doors down allegedly wandered into their cottage after a few too many drinks and cozied up next to them. The couple declined to cuddle with the reportedly intoxicated intruder and instead fled the house and called 911. When police arrived, they said they found the man sound asleep with his shorts partially pulled down (the sheets have since been burned, we hope). The wasted wanderer finally awoke and uttered an instant drunken classic: “This isn’t my house.”